Several research studies have shown (Berkman L.F, 1983: Cohen.S.,1985; Cassell J.1961) that people who get support from their friends and family are less likely to become sick Bereaved widows and widowers have increased possibility of suffering from several diseases because they don't receive the support of their spouse on whom they had depended so long After the death of a near relative, if a person continues to have enough social contact and receive support from them, he will not face the increased possibility of suffering from any diseases, The sense of loss and the feeling of loneliness that accompanies him in such a situation is infact very hazardous to health. Even while passing through bereavement stress if a person mixes with friends involves oneself in some community activity or maintains a sense of well being he is able to enjoy positive health. Man suffers more in absence of social support as compared to women. Its not that women don't need the support but they express their feelings more often and hence don't feel lonely and have less sense of deprivation. These factors should taken into account while offering Holistic Health Care Necessary suggestions and motivation would change activities leading to complete recovery from illness.
Some people fear in making friends. Sanjay was brought to me for adjustment difficulties. His father complained that he would not continue in one job for long enough. For trivial reasons he would submit his resignation. During the course of therapy I found that he had fears of forming friendships and hence lacked the necessary social support. He remained lonely and sometimes resented himself and others. I taught him the simple way of developing social contacts. There is no need of serious communication. When you meet others talk about common topics or just inquire about certain aspects of the person's life. This does not need a lot of knowledge. If you just come out of your imaginary fear and start talking to others you will be able to make friends.
Even if you feel you are not able to talk at all, you can still make friends. Just become a good listener. In the present era people are so busy that when someone wants to talk no one is ready to listen. If you listen to their others story with empathy they would certainly become friendly. Both of you would receive the necessary social support. Many patients who benefit from psychotherapy infact do so because psychotherapists patiently listen to his or her problems. When a patient talks about all his emotional problems he becomes free and light. Hence when you listen to others problems you are partly doing the job of a psychotherapist.
A fact also worth mentioning is that even if you have failed in getting a proper response from one person on you having initiated the talk, don't think that others also won't give you good response. The most probable reason is that he himself had some emotional problem or his personality itself was peculiar. If you attempted making friendship with several persons, you would certainly get a few good friends.
For mental support you don't need many friends. Even if you have one or two good friends to whom you can express all your problems and feelings it is just enough.
Practice of meditation, faith in God, a spiritual belief system, etc. also give tremendous mental support. Raja Yoga meditation practice fills one's mind with positive feelings and hence even in absence of friends one can maintain a sense of security and positive attitude towards life. So long as you have a will and desire to be a useful member of society your physiological process will support you and you will have a surplus health resource. It is only when you feel frustrated and empty within that catabolic physiological processes increase leading to the mal-functioning of bodily organs. Medical experts are of the opinion that over fifty percent of diseases are functional. You become sick because you want to become sick. Knowingly or unknowingly, consciously or unconsciously you accept the illness.
Source: Brahmakumari